COMBAT

This letter is from April 1987...
You gotta love segues...

Monday
Dear Adam-
Do you think it's a good idea to leave the piano in the lobby of a building you're not in anymore? Personally, I would put it in storage for $100 for one month. It may even cost only $50.
There's something new for roaches called Combat. You can buy it at Ralph's. There's no mess and no smell and it works. I got it for my kitchen.
A thought-Alisa is your girlfriend. But until the two of you "tie the knot", I don't think you should confide about very personal matters, do you?
Some things are better kept confidential.
I love you-
Mom

 

Eva Marie Saint

Tuesday
Adam-
I just finished up with the Department of Motor Vehicles-and the guy who snapped my picture, asked me if I was Eva Marie Saint! The movie star!
Just thought I'd let you know!
Love,
Mom

Dude

For anyone who wonders if I still get letters to this day, the answer is, "Yes, Your Honor". This one arrived just yesterday. (My mom doesn't know the first thing about emails.)

While some of you might think it'd be cool to have a mom incorporating the hippest catch phrases into their salutations, the rest of you may understand why I just HAD to post this one immediately. It made me feel kind of strange. OK, VERY strange. I mean, she's just not the "duuuude" kinda guy, you know?

Anyway, I've got to go now and update my resume. Once I nail this high-paying job she wrote me about, it's lunch for everybody on me, baby!

Friday-
Adam-
Check it out dude-
(I like the way that guy Randy talks on American Idol)-
New York Life Insurance is hiring people for various positions. I saw it in today's LA Times. You should look into this. Their starting salary is $34,000 a year!
Love,
Mom

 

Con Men

Sunday

Dear Adam,

I heard on National TV that there is a telephone scam on. Con men call on the phone and try to sell you all kinds of things, gets your credit card number and cons people. Hang up on anyone on the phone that tells you of a great deal. Someone called me the other day and I hung up on him. He called me back and I told him if he bothered me again, I would report him to the Better Business Bureau. So, be careful of telephone salesmen.
Love,
Mom