Saturday, February 27, 2010

Do Me A Favor-Please Don't Eat Sushi

Ladies and Gentlemen, here it is! The letter and newspaper clipping from 1989 that inspired the title for this blog! It was waiting for me to re-discover it at the bottom of one of my piles.
So without further ado, it is my honor to share it here with you. Right now, for the very first time!
The worm has turned.




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Saturday, February 20, 2010

There, I Feel Better

Uh oh. I sold that piano with the bench.

Sunday
Dear Adam
As I'm getting on in years, you should know that my Will is in the piano bench and my life insurance policy is with Mutual of Omaha.
There, I feel better.
Love,
Mom


Saturday, February 13, 2010

Lutheran

If this letter from the late 80's could be performed as a scene of a phone conversation with my Jewish mother, my part would probably go something like this:
Hello? Hi Mom. Ok. Ok. Ok. Oh, right. Ok. Cool. Right. Ugg. Nice girl...right. Alright. What? (Click.) Hello? Mom? Hello? (End scene.)

Saturday
Adam-
This is my plan. When I get the ticket from you to go to California on Thanksgiving, I'll stay with you for that weekend. Then, I'll stay with Reva for 3 weeks. The lady near Melrose.
Then, I'll fly to NY on December 26th, stay with Bonnie for 2 weeks. Then, move into the woman's residence in NY and live there while I work at that paper on Wall Street. I can't stay here any longer than Thanksgiving!!! I'd rather be dead. This is no place for a nice girl like me!
So, when I call to make my ticket, it will only be 1 way.
Love,
From your Lutheran Mom


Saturday, February 6, 2010

Grapes

In Adam's family, nothing is regular.

Monday
Adam-
Grapes are very good for having bowel movements. I didn't see any grapes in your house!!
Mom